Things have been going pretty well, lost 2 pounds this week. It was a pretty uneventful week though, and did get a few small rides in. Went out to Cuba city again, and on the way there I hit a 15mpg average, which felt awesome. Admittedly the ride on the highway is pretty flat though, but I think it will be similar to my tour in door county.
On the way back from Cuba city I felt zapped, I didn’t bring a snack and did not stop for a banana at kwik trip. I was struggling to even hit 8mph even on the flats. It felt like I had lead tires, and it was very discouraging. The next day I went riding and it felt EXACTLY the same way, even though I had just left the house. I got off Katrina and looked her over, I did find the problem. My seat had slipped down, robbing me of all my power. So I put the seat back where it belongs(thanks to some electrical tape I put on, I know exactly where to put it). Immediately it felt better, and I am glad I figured it out.
I went for another ride that night, and it went ok until I tried a new area out. I did NOT make it up the BBBEH’s that I found. It was extremely discouraging and left me feeling a bit depressed the next day. I was going up, and just lost all my motivation. I could see the top but my legs stopped moving, despite my “want” of getting up the hill. I stopped for a bit and started going again. I went about 5 feet and stopped again, feeling defeated. I turned around and road down the hill, yet there was another one steeper on the way back. I didn’t make it up that one in one go either, but while I was stopped I looked around noticing how wonderful the sunset was looking.
I was so focused on “getting up the hills” that I forgot to stop and look around at the beauty surrounding me. So I stopped, rested and simply relaxed. I got on my bike, pushed my self up the hill and headed home. While I did learn a valuable lesson, as I wrote before I was depressed going into the next day.
How do I stop feeling like a failure? I KNOW I could make it up those hills, but I quit, which means I failed. Failures never succeed, they are a looser, and a looser is worthless, worthless people are quitters. You get the idea. I would love to tell you that I simply examined it, shrugged it off and felt better. That would be a bold face lie. I did though realize that it wasn’t true. Yes I would love to have made it up those hills, but you can’t always win. I did NOT quit, because it isn’t something that can be quit. It is simply life, and you know what? I WILL make it up that hill eventually, and that day will feel all the sweeter. I am reminded of one of my childhood favorite movies, and a song that was on it.
It is something important to remember, that we never fail if we learn from our “failures”.
I am excited to mention that I have started doing a podcast with another stay at home dad(who plans to join me for the bike tour). I will post the link when it is available, but here is a link to his blog.
Don’t forget you can also donate to the bike tour at http://www.gofundme.com/BigBonedBiker any donation is helpful!
Keep on Rolling!
Big Boned Biker